Day Five… Uncomfortable yet honest

We are playing… The 12 Days of Labyrinths Game
12DaysOfLabyrinthsPlay along in December, any 12 days or just make it last all month. Today’s post moves beyond the simple preparations into the action of the game itself. Read The Game and How to Play in the link below to follow along. Then send along comments of your experience. 
The Game and How to Play
Preparations…12 Things that Matter
Preparations…12 Gifts, Talents or Abilities
Preparations…12 People of Influence
Day 1  l  Day 2 l Day 3 l Day 4

On the fifth day of labyrinths my good friends gave to me a way to make it through emergencies!

IMG_4546I found myself on the St. Rose Hospital Labyrinth on the south side of town. I had first walked this many years ago when my sister was going through a tough time. I looked up the labyrinths in the area and couldn’t believe I found one a mile from her home.  She was a little resistant at first, though she and both her boys came along and together we walked.

I had a great observance of what was going on in their lives watching how they walked. It really fit the patterns of their life and while I might use this in coaching and workshops metaphorically, this was family and I just made an interesting observation that I kept to myself, happy to know it destressed her and amused the boys.

Today I am walking this same labyrinth tucked into a courtyard outside the Emergency Room. For those who might face emergencies or time in the hospital this can be a way of release for families and patients, though it is also a time of reflection and meditation for staff and workers who interface with drama regularly.

I asked my questions upon entering,  and as I had been writing during the morning I wasn’t surprised when an idea around writing came up, and the expected abilities that would support this as a matter of  importance. It didn’t seem very significant however, and so on I walked into the 12 circuits of the Chartres labyrinth design with curiosity in mind.

IMG_4545The labyrinth was situated between two buildings surrounded by a circular landscape of trees accessed by a pathway and a set of arches that connected the buildings. As I walked I looked at the things that came to mind wondering if any had significance to my thoughts or might offer as signs I might wish to pay attention to.

It dawned on me that I was looking for the expected and in that frame of mind I would get the expected and not the honest. Then it came, the person of significance in my life this year wouldn’t be someone I would celebrate, though they had made quite an impact that severely affected my life. Sometimes we think it is only the good we want to appreciate, though those that give us the hardest time can also lead to some of the greatest moments in learning.

It began to dawn on me as I reluctantly thought of this person. I hadn’t done that in a while and now for some reason my stomach clenched to even consider their presence, I hadn’t realized I had any feeling left. What had once been a  promise for the world had become a knife in my back driven by paranoid delusion and jealousy. Then I  noted the date and realized it was time to make a decision.

In the span of one week’s time I might celebrate my liberation, a year had passed. My dilemma, I wasn’t the first person this insidious attack and subsequent practice of immoral stalking, public impugning of character and threats had happened to, and probably wouldn’t be the last either.  What popped into my head was the question of whether to make a significant statement so this person might be finally exposed for the illegal manner in which they operated, in any scenario it is a classic no win situation and an example of the prisoners dilemma. The only way to achieve a better outcome is to stop playing the game.

I might wish to morally take a stand for myself and all concerned, and it might be the right thing to do, but who really wins in such an outcome and what further stalking might occur as a result? People of this kind feel they have their own kind of justice and no matter the law, they will die fighting it. It is an interesting anniversary to suddenly recall and an unnerving deadline to unexpectedly face.

IMG_4551For this blog and this playful game, this situation might be a bold statement to make. It has become our nature to often wish to look the other way at what is uncomfortable, and even though the reality of stalking is much worse for many in the world, until we can shine a light, it doesn’t go away… the path sadly never ends for some.

I am healthy, have many strengths and much courage. As I walked I noted that I had indeed moved with steps that authentically met the path as someone who knows how to smile when it rains, not as a cover but from a true sense of inner joy. I will celebrate this interesting anniversary as one of triumph because I did not quit and rose above the din of discouragement and negative assaults at a time where I had already lost, released and accepted the grave reality of a great many things.

I learned a multitude from this year of experience, sat in healthy respect appreciating the emotions that appeared and continued to find my way in spite of the obstacles. I realized some amazing resonance with a project I began nine years ago and how it had set the tone of my life. I opened to new opportunities and found myself overseas and in the company of now international friends. I took a moved into some new areas and stepped up to other leadership positions and am reinventing my life in ways that are even more purposeful and have deeper perspective with a greater passion. I would think I had indeed found better paths.

What began two years ago and ended a year later in surreal circumstances, has opened doors of possibility. One would think I had the world by the tail except for the fact that I have this one problem lurking behind. Letting it go was something I sat with, appreciated all the gifts of it and released it. Now the anniversary that calls reminds me that I can change the future with a statement, that we can live in a different world if we speak up for the injustices and we call to stand those who lurk in the shadows diminishing themselves as they cast disparagement upon others.

This walk was essentially the catalyst I needed to secure legal aid for an element of this problem, because in this day and age, we have to hire legal aid to protect ourselves from someone else’s misguided trauma. I now see how this can be addressed so that my personal and professional well being can move forward in a valued manner. Such is the insight of walking, listening to the heart and unwinding the mind.

IMG_4541For those you may know similarly situated, the insidious nature  of jealousy gone awry may seem to have no answers. I encourage group support, legal action where you can and speaking your truth.

They are cowards in hiding and the greater they seem to be, the more deluded they become when the fall from the height of their own ego. For me the Emergency sign that spans the arch over the entrance door served as an important warning for preventative care now. Perhaps this message serves to assist someone else as well. This is one of those insidious epidemic illnesses of the world that thrives on our inaction and silence.

This blog serves to support the members of the 365 Club of the Labyrinth Society and is not in any way a forum for promoting or securing advocacy of any type, this story is purely an honest outcome and a manifestation that can and has occurred in this one instance of walking a labyrinth. That it might relate to others similarly situated relates to the benefit of having this blog to promote, share and advance learning of the varietal ways in which the labyrinth can and is used. 

Categories: The Daily Walk | Tags:

Post navigation

Blog at

%d bloggers like this: